Recently... it's almost as if I don't even know what I want. So one of my close friends got married recently... and I wasn't invited to his wedding. I say close friend because I feel like if I needed his help I would reach out to him anytime. And if he reached out to me for help - I definitely would try to help him. Or whatever. I guess for my friendship is like the Social Link in Persona 4. Once you reach level 10 you can't go back. And this friend of mine is definitely a level 10.

So he recently got married and I didn't get invited to his wedding. On one hand... I'm kinda relieved because I don't think going to his wedding would've been something that I wanted or enjoyed. You only get so many hours in a week and there's so much shit that I want to do. I want to read books. Code. Watch shows. I should be meditating and exercising more. The list goes on and on.

But on the other hand I'm kind of bummed that I didn't get invited. I guess it's strange in that way. There was so much time for me to reach out to him to hang out and stuff. But I never did. I guess it's because I'm too focused on me recently. It's like - I want to hang out with my friends but I also want to just say home and do my own shit. Shrug. I don't even know what I want.

On one hand I kind of want to go out more. Yet when my friends invite me to go out... I don't really want to go out. bleh. I guess I should just distill it down the first principles. And when I look at things in that way it makes knowing what I want and the decisions that I want easier to make. I'm working towards freedom.

Wow... I guess writing shit out really helps. I kinda feel better about the decisions that I've been making recently because it helps that I wrote it down. Everything boils down to your principles and what you want in life.

tl;dr - follow your principles. make decisions based on what you want in your life</strong></p>